xmas.. alot of memories.. good ones.. den as i sat dere chatting with my frens, i thot to myself. is it really worth it? is he really worth my tears? i have a long way to go.. and i shouldnt let someone who has left to hold me back from wat i'm supposed to do. it's juz dat, when he left, he took a part of me. and now, it feels like life is juz moving by slowly. i'm tired but i have only myself. *van might argue that i still have her. love you, hubby. muacks* when i want to share my thots, there's only air. it doesnt feel real but it is real. uttering rubbish at this ungodly hour is really not my style.

i tell myself, i'll juz allow myself one more nite to rmb. to rmb him, to rmb the times we had. den it's time to move on. cos he dun love me lyk before and i noe my feelings for him has changed. wat used to be hope has turned into resignation. wat used to be passion has turned into numbness. sounds so emo rite.. i AM emo.. zzzz hate myself for being so weak.

give me one more nite. to cry, to love, to give everything i have. tml, i will move on. i will...





i've decided.. i wanna be a mom before the age of 25. i dun care i'm married anot. i'm ok with having a kid before marriage. i juz wan a kid. i dun even mind being a single mom.....







1 or 2 years later, i WILL leave sg.. and i might not come back..